I watched a movie last night on Netflix, Lady Jane. The movie was about a girl who was put in line for the English throne after King Henry the 8th died. His son Edward was too young to rule and very ill. Before he died he requested Jane be made queen through the conniving of a trusted advisor. Jane was the daughter of King Henry's cousin and a trusted friend of Edward's. This all happened before Queen Mary took over. The whole issue was religion. Mary was catholic and Jane was a reformer. Edward was raised in the reformed church and didn't want to leave the country to Mary, a catholic, and have her undo everything King Henry did as king.
Jane, never wanted to be made queen. Her parents forced her into it and she had also just gotten forced into a marriage to Edward's scheming advisor's youngest son, Guilford. They were 15. Well the people of England didn't want Jane to be queen, there was no popular support for her. A war broke out over the whole thing when Mary challenged Jane's right to the throne. Jane's cause was lost when her army was defeated and she and Guilford went to the tower of London to wait to be tried as traitors. They were nothing more than two children made to pay for the ambitions of their parents.
Queen Mary was all set to forgive them and grant a pardon to them both until her soon to be betrothed Prince Phillip of Spain refused to come to England and marry her unless the threat of her crown was removed. Jane and Guilford had to be eliminated. Queen Mary had to end up sacrificing them in order to be with Phillip because Jane's father, who had already done enough damage to Jane's life, had his pride wounded and claimed he was going to make it up to his daughter and lead an army to take back the crown in Jane's honor. He was stopped of course and killed, but that act forced Queen Mary to have to get rid of the threat. If Jane's father had just let it go, Jane could have been pardoned, lived a full life with Guilford and been happy. They were both beheaded at 15 years old.
I watch movies like this about what happened in England in those horrible days and wonder how much creative license was taken with the movie script and how much of this really went on. I bet quite a bit really happened the way it is pictured. It was so dangerous to be part of the ruling class in the 16th century. The bottom line is that Jane's father was completely to blame for her fate. In the name of "helping" her he was ultimately the reason she died. He did more harm than good by trying to right an already lost cause. It was not for his daughter that he did what he did. It was to ease his own pride and guilt. He had to know deep down, that doing what he did would only make Jane a bigger threat to Mary and threats were eliminated.
In order to "help" his daughter he made things worse for her. This whole concept is something lost on some people. The moral of the story is, cut your losses and accept what is. It's just not possible to make up for past wrongs sometimes. There are times when walking away from something or someone is the only choice that makes sense. Forcing something else is an even bigger disaster. Like for poor Jane, who was helpless and a complete victim in the entire ordeal.
Jane was amazing too. She was educated and a free thinker. She read Plato, and did it in Latin. She was brilliant. Jane Dudley was sacrificed for her father's foolishness and Mary's need to be with Prince Phillip. These kinds of things happened in those times. It's written in history again and again that the innocent pay for the sins of the parents. Children are often at the mercy of a bad parent. Bad choices. Things they can't do anything about. People have children every day in the world, some know what they're doing and some don't. Parenthood is a responsibility that some people prepare for and some don't.
I wanted children. From as far back as I can remember whenever anyone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say I wanted to be a mommy. More than anything I wanted children. I prepared my whole life to be a mother. I think Taryn did too. I see movies like this and the whole concept of putting my kids in harms way is lost on me. That is something I could never have done. I would die myself rather than ever put my child in the line of fire. Things were different back then. Royal children were pawns in a chess game. It makes me wonder, were human emotions so different that mothers could allow their daughters to be used like that?
I wanted nothing more than to raise babies and have a happy family. I wanted to watch them grow and give them everything they needed. I think when Taryn gave her life for Kayan I completely understood that. It's what I would have done. If only I'd had that choice, but I didn't. It was a helpless feeling. Sitting there in that hospital room, holding her hand and realizing it was completely out of my control.
Accepting what we have no power to control is important. When it's time to let go we need to do that and not make it worse. As a parent that's our job to know when to let go and when to keep fighting. It's the toughest part of being a mother or father. To know the difference.
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